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Thousands of Japanese rush to get their hands on giant penis

Hold onto your hats girls, particularly if you live in the Japanese City of Hodare, because this is where a 93 stone or 603 kilogram penis is waiting for you to ride upon, if you newly married! Before any of you get too excited the 7 foot monster is actually a wooden phallus which is part of an annual fertility festival and the monster penis is believed to bring fertility, good luck, and marital success.

Customers left angry as some Aldi crisps had only four in the packet

German Discount Supermarket thought that it would be a good idea to provide some “own label” Monster Munch style crisps, and the customers also believed that it was good idea too, but what they got in the packet, left them disappointed and angry! The Aldi own label crisps are certainly cheaper, which is the reason so many mum’s with young children bought them, but some kids and their parents were in for a shock when it was found that when opened, the packets could often only contained as little as five “claws in the bag and for one mother, Rhian Green and her 13 year old son Bailey, just two crisps!

New Zealand woman accuses Seat Belt Manufacturers of being racist against fat people

We are aware that there is the human race and of course this can be classified into sub categories such as the African Race, the European Race, Chinese race and so on, but we have, until now that is, been completely unaware that a New Zealand woman believes that being fat is another race! Anyone watching the incredible performances of the New Zealand “All Blacks” rugby team will testify that these are seriously big men, but fat they are not and as far as we are aware, they manage to secure their seat belts when in a car.

Indian Teenager wakes up on the way to his own funeral

Anyone who has read any of the Dennis Wheatley novels will remember “The Ka of Gifford Hillary” which is a horror/supernatural story series of events in which Gifford Hillary was killed by a ray gun invented by his scientist friend. This is when readers find out that his spirit, or Ka, leaves his body and tries to communicate with the real world. He has always been terrified of being buried alive and stated that the lid of the coffin should not be screwed down; that air holes should be bored in its ends and that the family vault should not be closed until one week after his coffin had been lowered into his grave. The story is fascinating and is a highly recommended read.

Distraught Clubber goes to A&E so that doctors can glue back on her broken finger nail

During the week of the 6th of February, the UK national broadcaster the BBC spent a large proportion of the 6 o’clock news to demonstrate that the A&E departments of hospitals, particularly in the English regions were at near breaking point. The reporters did not suggest why hospitals struggled with the huge numbers, and various people that were interviewed suggested that throwing more money at it would solve the problems!

Middle aged woman strips off the have a fight with her best friend

This is not quite the thing to be expected from two pupils who attended the £11,440 Boarding per term, prestigious Cheltenham Ladies College, but then of course it was not pupils from this school that caused the story that appeared in the Gloucestershire Live report, neither was it two ex-pupils either, it is safe to say.

Shopper finds £11,000 of cocaine in his Nesquik

He went out in all innocence to get himself a few things from his local supermarket Zaragoza in north-east Spain including Nesquik, but he soon found out that he got much more than a popular Nestle product, he found a cool stash of cocaine! Fortunately for the shocked shopper, the class ‘A’ narcotic was not mixed in with the instant milkshake! What he did notice was that the lid of the large tub of Nesquik which he had bought appeared to be not snugly fitted, for a very good reason which became apparent when he opened the product. He soon found that there hidden among the sugary chocolate powder, was a 250g packet of the Class ‘A’ narcotic.

Would you let an old woman lick your eyeball clean?

As everyone knows, the eye is very sensitive and if a foreign body such as a piece of grit, or a small flying insect goes into it, it can be not only painful, but could cause some damage. Most peoples’ natural reaction is to immediately rub the eye, but that can make matters worse.

Jilted girlfriend blindfolds her lover and slices off his penis

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, the famous saying tells us, and so it appears for one particular woman in North East India as she ran down the street with her boyfriend’s penis after cutting it off. No she had not caught him playing naughty with another woman; it was down to the tradition of parents arranging marriage for their offspring.

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